11/10/2007 -
Believe it or not, but I actually like my job. Some people, after 12 hours of screaming moms and babies, will probably go nuts and give up the first day. And I don't blame them because I feel the same way after 4 consecutive 12-hour night shifts. Like the ones I'm supposed to do this weekend.
It's funny. It's almost as if there's a trend. This week, I've had at least two moms who are 17 years old or younger. One of them, delivered at home in her toilet. Talk about being in denial. This tiny girl who is probably less than 100 lbs. before being pregnant, claimed she had no idea she was even pregnant. And I take this with my eyebrows raised because at that body type and weight, there is no way you could not tell you're not pregnant. A pregnancy changes you in ways I could probably never fully explain because I've never been there myself but it does. It's a major thing. And to look at it like it was a disease that will just pass and go away if you don't think about it, is just not the way to welcome someone into the world.
I just think back to the time I was 17 and though I can't imagine myself getting pregnant at that age, even then I was a very mature 17 year old. But that's me. I cannot speak for anyone else, especially the ones who are in this situation. I try so hard not to stereotype this young moms because I hope for the best for their future, for their babies. But I worry about my young moms the same way I worry about their babies. I see this mom not even wanting to hold and feed her own kid and I can't walk out of the room and say, "Oh well, it's just another day at work". But that's why I'm this profession. Because I can be jaded and say I don't really care, but I do.
I worry about them going home and not knowing what to do with a baby. I worry about them not having any support or even a place to go. I worry about their babies not getting the attention they so need and deserve. But even I can only do so much. With all these pre-wedding things coming at me, plus all these work stuff, it's no wonder I'm so stressed. But I guess the good thing is I recognize it even at this early stage. There's still so much to learn.
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